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It starts out innocent enough,
beginning with a lie and ending in a quagmire of polluted runoff. In some ways,
due to our cultural mores, we’re all guilty and perhaps the best way to change
our future is to be aware of our flaws. Remember the Aesop fable about the
Monkey and the Dolphin? When the ship sinks and the dolphin comes to rescue the
drowning monkey you’d think the monkey would be humble but instead tells a
bold-faced lie to the dolphin and ends up in deep trouble, thus the moral of
the story is: don't tell lies.
I unintentionally practice lying on my dogs. “Sure,
you go outside for a few minutes and I’ll give you a snack.” An hour later,
they wonder where the snacks are and they look at me as if they don’t trust me
anymore. When I go somewhere, I tell them I’ll be back soon, even if it’s hours
and hours later. They know when I’m lying. I’d make a horrid politician. We can’t
help it. Lying is part of life and yes, even honest, churchgoing angels have
complimented the inedible church casserole or the funny looking little bundle
of joy. There are no ugly babies, right?
After a while, we begin to believe
the lies. Soon we’re immune to our friend’s lies and we accept their lies as
sweet-talk wrapped around kindness. We call them white lies.
“My butt is curvy, not fat.” (Sentiment shared by a famous reality show star.)
“He loved my book.” (A very short
review-probably didn’t finish reading the entire book)
“Nutella is made of nuts. It’s good
for you.”(I’ll never dispute this.)
“We have unbiased reporting.”
(Really? Media equivalent of a used Yugo salesperson saying, ‘trust me’.)
“You paint better than Monet.”(Overly
friendly and slightly suspicious assessment of your first painting.)
“That color looks good on me—sometimes.”
(Probably never.)
“Mohair sweaters don’t itch.”(Said,
the holiday-help at the department store.)
“That’s a nice hairstyle.” (Is it?
From which angle?)
“I thought my emails are private.” (And
you believe in Santa?)
“I did a lot of research before
buying that lemon.” (Auto ads don’t count as research.)
“Bacon is better for you than fruit.
Think of all the sugar in that fruit.”(Proteins and fruit carbs are both
necessary and this argument can go on for hours—believe what you want to
believe.)
“You sing better than Adele and
Mariah rolled into one.” (I was told Celine, but okay.)
“These pants look good.” (Sorry,
they don’t look good in any light—okay, maybe in the dark-pitch dark.)
Recently, we’ve heard some doozies
such as the finger-pointing Senator who said small hands meant another body
part is also small. Uglier still was the other candidate retorting and oversharing,
as if it mattered to the world.
Don’t elected officials know that
there are much worse things to worry about than their personal image issues? Who are they lying to anyway? Lest we forget, even the rescued monkey had to lie!!! By the time November
rolls around, I’m afraid voters will have collective trust anxiety, exactly like my two
skeptical Chihuahuas!
