Transitioning into Fall

“And gathering swallows twitter in the skies.”

From: Ode to Autumn by John Keats

Many friends look forward to the end of summer and the cooler temperatures. Fall is a warning that it’s going to be cold. Winter is on the way. It’s like a yellow light telling us to prepare to stop.

Or shop…for Christmas, before the bad weather and crowds make it difficult. 

A time when I’m not sure I’ll need a sweater, but should take one anyway. The leaves change and most of them are blown down the street. Frightening Halloween decorations fill store shelves and spiced pumpkin lattes are the rage at the coffee house. Restaurant menus reflect the harvest with less salad and more soup.

It’s a time to let go of open-toed shoes and sleeveless tops. I hang up my beach towel and fold away swimsuits. It’s getting darker and the days end faster. Instead of evening rays of light, we turn on lamps. Instead of outdoor activities, we turn towards cooking, reading, crocheting, sewing, television and computer games. The sky is bluer than ever and yet the forecast is a calculated cornucopia of various predictions. The world does a quick-change backstage for the third act, exactly like a star!

Even the birds fly faster. They make their nests. I hear them communicating as if to say they are making progress. Maybe this year I will embrace this amber-hued transition with the same joy as the flock outside my window.  It’s not just about their nests. They are pulling me in, making sure I notice how hard they work. They entertain, spread their wings and chirp. I’m pretty sure they want me to love this season as much as they do. Shamed into the truth, I have no excuses.

Insomnia About Alberta

I can't even imagine the nightmare happening in Canada right now. Watching the news last night made me so upset I began smelling smoke and started to cough, way down here in California. No, I wasn't actually hallucinating but I'll admit to being sensitive. One reporter called it 'literally hell on earth' and since I figured he might not know what hell is really like, his account was the only one sounding hopeful. This morning, I wrote this poem and while I also know that my loss of sleep means nothing to the poor souls who are losing everything right now, I hope they know we have them in our hearts. And for those who want to donate here's a link. All Red Cross Donations are being matched by the government of Canada. 

Insomnia in California about Alberta

The heat rose--started in my toes--

wrapped around my collar--suffocating my nose.

And distant tears

can’t appreciate real fears

but my coughing wouldn’t stop.

I grabbed a bucket and mop

my personal menace

an emotional apprentice.

I had to work it out.

and now  I’m writing about...

flames that look like Hell.

Cinders that smell,

ash from fifty feet

landing on dry peat,

homes and cars

churches and bars.

People—masses of them-- drive somewhere--

anywhere but there.

Away from home--

a melancholy poem.

Shelter they seek--

the young and the weak.

Their agony and loss

in my head while I floss.

We crawl under cover.

Two guilty lovers

safe behind the news

till our coffee brews....

And my mind stirs

as the smoke swirls--

destruction spraying--

while I’m praying.

Has this happened to you too? Have factual television newscasts made you lose sleep?

Five Ridiculous but Slightly Stressful Things to Smile About

With the recent turmoil, the earthquakes and politicos going off the deep end, my heart suggested I keep my thoughts quiet until things get better. Unfortunately, things aren’t lightening up too much—it’s as if Les Miz is playing out on the six o’clock news-- every day. Meanwhile, we have blogs, stories and books to write and someday publish. For some strange reason, the world won’t stop so I can get off and be emotional. Must be why so many have signed up for a one-way ticket to Mars and I keep finding humor in the painfully mundane. Examples:

1.       At the end of the day.—Almost every television personality, interviewer and interviewee uses this transitioning phrase in their dialogue. Last week we went to a real estate conference to learn about house flipping and yes, the speaker kept saying it was the end of the day and obviously, I began to yawn. (And no, we’re not interested in house flipping but I always like to learn things, such as quick ways to find my inner snore.) Meteorologists, Presidential candidates, comedians, talk show hosts, sports announcers—everyone says it! When my doctor said it, I almost flipped out. If you haven’t noticed this unusual trend, you will now. Sorry.

2.       What do you think about that auto commercial indicating in large type that those are real people, not actors? I’m sure they realize how silly that is but it’s starting to bug me, even though I’m aware some actors are aliens.

3.       We love listening to classical radio on the weekends and every Saturday morning the announcer comes on to interview some violin player--or he or she chats about some movie music for hours. Don’t they realize we’re listening to their station for music, not Talk radio? Blah, blah, blah, we switch it off and stream YouTube. Does anyone still listen to the radio?

4.       When we’re in the car and we’re listening to a rock station and a car ad comes on about leasing a car for $199 but right when you think it’s finished, the spokesman continues on a super fast tirade of all the stuff he has to disclose in ten seconds. Of course, he’s reading so fast there’s no way anyone in the world could understand any of it but the car dealer feels he’s covered all his bases. As someone who spent hours writing automotive ad copy for newspapers, I think this might not be honest. Is it just me?

5.       So you pull into the driveway, go inside and decide to pop a frozen pie in the oven. The box actually says, “Remove plastic before baking.” Your hands become fists before you preheat the oven. You control yourself for a few minutes, jump up and down and inhale deeply before your cells divide and you know you’re about to blow a fuse.

At the end of the day, you’re tired of everyone treating you like you’re stupid and you scream at anyone who will listen about how insensitive that frozen food company must be if they have to tell other, senseless people not to cook the plastic wrap with the pie.

 But you aren’t senseless, are you? You pay taxes and count your blessings. You're not a victim! Why blame the pie? Breathe, turn on the radio. “You have nothing to fear, nothing to hide!”

(2 minute clip from Les Miserables)

Blogophobia-The Fear that No-one Will Read My Post Unless I Add a Picture of a Cat

Fears—writers love them. They fuel the fire, creating high drama in our stories.

We may not admit it but most of us have some version of anxiety or dread, even if it’s only a nominal, society induced, family-related habit called worry. For many unfortunate people, fear keeps them from leaving home. You’ve probably heard of agoraphobia or the common fear of heights called acrophobia. Screenwriters use some of these fears and create an entire plot based on a particular fear. Remember Die Hard or the super funny High Anxiety? I never saw it but imagine Friday the 13^th plays on triskaidekaphobia or the fear of the number thirteen. When you come right down to it, even Gone with the Wind is about our fear of loss and I can’t imagine anything scarier than Snakes on a Plane-(Haven’t seen it). A fear of ants is myrmecophobia, and I’ve woven some not so frightening horror scenes based on it into my work in progress.

 Many of us giggle at some of the strange sounding phobias such as the fear of chickens (alektorophobia) or the common fear the school principal might have known about, called didaskaleinophobia, which is another way of saying you’re afraid of going to school. (I may have suffered from that during finals week.) The funniest one I can relate to (only because I never learned to use them) is the fear of chopsticks. Consecotaleophobia. But seriously, can you imagine there are people actually terrorized by the thought of chopsticks? Don’t you want to hug them and offer them a fork? Could you work a fear like that into your manuscript?

 Once we rule out the fear of chopsticks, the fear of chickens might manifest itself in different ways depending on the person. Is it a fear of chickens walking across the road or the one diced and tossed with peanuts and fired up peppers in the Kung Pao sauce? Or maybe, in the end, it’s those wicked peppers after all, and the chickens get the blame?

While I’m no expert, I think certain fears are “normal.” There’s the fear of tornadoes and hurricanes (lilapsophobia) or the fear of Hell, (hadephobia) and my personal fear of cats, called gatophobia. Sorry, my cat loving friends but those little critters freak me out. (Wait, come back—I think they’re cute—it’s the way they lock eyes with me. All right, maybe it’s not normal but I don’t plan to get over it by absorbing myself in online cat therapy.)

Scary cat?

As a writer, I probably suffer from dysgrammatophobia or the fear of bad grammar and ortographobia which is the fear of making spelling errors. Can you imagine spelling these phobias for a spelling bee? Even the lottery people are trying to convince us we had better lose our fear of wealth (plutophobia) (this sounds curable) and start playing the Powerball numbers before it’s too late.

Last night, we discussed our real fears and mine is losing my eyesight, (scotomaphobia) but my husband had one that wasn’t even on the list. He presumes it’s a deep-rooted fear that comes through from his cave-man roots. (I knew it!) Though we laughed about it and I Googled it, it seemed strange there isn’t a fancy sounding phobia listed for his secret anxiety. He said the scariest thing he can think of is: being eaten alive by a bear or any large animal and we haven’t even seen The Revenant. I wonder if seeing the movie will help overcome this fear or make it worse. Aren’t we supposed to face our fears? Is seeing a movie a form of therapy? Did you swim in the ocean more or less, after seeing Jaws?

Are you afraid of something and have you tried overcoming your fears? If you're a writer, have you worked a phobia into your plot?

(This post is supposed to be humorous and not intended for anything other than rapport among my followers, most of whom are writers and artists. I realize the serious nature of phobias and my compassionate heart recommends counseling or medical intervention for anyone who cannot cope with these psychological issues.) 

P is for Pinky

Pinky is a playful, 10 yr old puppy.

(Notice the active tail in my blurred photo.)

She has been rescued twice and sometimes she gets anxious,

especially around loud noises and strangers. She has a boisterous,

deep bark that belies her 15 pounds. She hates closed doors

but loves chewing on her toys. They don't last very long.

Pinky and my other dog Fiona like to argue.

Pinky is resting in the back while Fiona stands guard.

Fiona is only 5 pounds but she scares Pinky.

In fact, Fiona scares everyone--even me. 

Poor Pinky.

Boo! Have You Ever Considered Acupuncture?

I know, I know--this is not what you expected around here but I wrote this as a researched, example of my writing for a content mill website. They rejected my writing sample and so I'm posting it here and I'll let you judge the article for yourself. Plus, I'm a firm believer in acupuncture. Actually,when a gastrointestinal surgeon said he wanted to operate, simply because I had some sort of irritable stomach disorder, it was time to look for other options. This all happened more than twenty years ago and knock on wood, the acupuncture worked! With Halloween around the corner, maybe I can scare you with this....

Wikipedia

No matter how old or mature we are, the first time we hear about acupuncture we are slightly shocked at the thought of, what we envision as huge sewing needles, like the ones our mother used to darn socks with, being used to cure whatever ails us. In fact, a basic description might be all we needed to inspire us to live healthy and eat our vegetables.

Once we’re over the fear factory and realize acupuncture is an ancient Chinese medical treatment that can help improve our sleep, ease our aching backs, soothe our digestion, dull our headaches/ arthritis, help us lose weight, quit smoking and give us incredible energy, that’s when considering acupuncture sounds like a wonderful choice for continual health. The minimally invasive technique uses very thin needles that are supposed to unblock the negative things holding us back from a happy life. A trained practitioner pinpoints the exact locations needed to increase the flow of positive energy and applies the sterilized, single-use needles. Every acupuncture office has a diagram showing the exact location of these ‘flow channels’ that are commonly  called meridians. The acupuncture specialist will meet with you to find out your needs and they will create a personalized treatment program based on your individual situation.

Though the use of acupuncture has become a controversial subject in the Western world of health and medicine, there are many, many supporters and medical professionals, including doctors, who prescribe acupuncture as an alternative option for continuous care.

Unlike strong medications with serious side effects, the side effect most associated with acupuncture is an increased bodily awareness. This awareness, coupled with gradual improvements can feel like a side effect because of the new, open and now flowing channels of positive energy. In Western medicine, the doctor might call that feeling euphoric or explain how endorphins have released into your bloodstream for one reason or another. Since everything is moving again, you might feel tired but by combining acupuncture and getting a good night’s rest, you will feel amazing!

In rare cases, there are patients whose skin feels sensitive and sore for 24 hours after the needles are removed but remember, these are qualified, trained specialists and the needles are extremely thin. 

Your health and well-being begins with knowing and understanding your options. If it has to do with your body, your life and your happiness, then you should ask questions, read all the information available and take control of your health today. 

What do you think? "No way, no how?"