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Friday, September 11, 2015

Behind Castle Walls

When we moved to our new home I felt fortunate to have a view of Mount Palomar, in San Diego. I’ve always enjoyed looking out at the mountains, dreaming of those elusive possibilities that are right over the horizon. Unfortunately, the builder of these homes decided on buying the flood zone next to us and he fenced us in with big cement blocks, developing a rather close-knit community right next door. Though I’m sad, I’m not completely disheartened. As a person who spent most of her life looking at those potentialities and trying to help others, I believe there’s a reason I’m supposed to reflect and look within right now. Ironically, I don’t have a choice in the matter and being ‘forced’ into thinking about life reminds me of studying for finals in school. No more sunrises over the mountain and no more views-- this is real folks and it feels serious.
Our private little temple, behind the wall in our gazebo.
It was much nicer with a view.

 Inside all of us are endless horizons and in my case, perhaps I’ve crossed so many mountains (literally by hiking or moving as well as figuratively), landing in so many valleys that I may have missed something along the way. (Knowing my attention span, this is highly possible.) Though I love reading books by talented authors and enjoy spiritual and religious verses, maybe it's time to search inside my own soul. And though I’ve always been a fan of prayer, there is much more I need to figure out.
A private place to read or think about the meaning of life.
 The morning glories are taking over!

 Our ugly wall--that will eventually be hidden behind green anyway—(greener still--after the drought)--appears to be a coincidental factor--coupled with a gentle dose of transcendent serendipity. I’ll take it as a sign to pray and meditate prior to writing, because maybe I’ll find my answers, deep inside. More importantly,  it’s time to stop dreaming about all those countless options. I’ve had years of doing that. It’s time to collect my thoughts, throw the dice and take a chance on my personal skill-set. Hmmm, let me contemplate on that for a while; here behind our castle wall.

Does it all sound like part of a plan?
 Can anyone relate and does this make sense to you?


  1. You will still be in your cozy home. Sorry this happened. Can it be OK to build on a flood plain? Can nothing be done by you and your neighbors. Hope you en joy your home even so.


  2. One hopes the builder doesn't get it into their head to build on a flood plain... that's asking for trouble.

  3. Take that little slice of privacy and security and use it to your advantage.
    And if you still want a view of the mountains, climb on the roof.

  4. I'm sorry - I totally understand how events out of control change your "paradise"

  5. I have to agree with William.

    Though I'd like having the wall there.

  6. Looks like the perfect place to snuggle up with a great book!

  7. I find it sad that more and more of these are going up everywhere. While introspection is good, I'd be tempted to draw pictures on my side.

  8. Hello Eve, I admire your fortitude – I think I would be screaming and sobbing.