Thursday, September 13, 2018

Bakery Rebellion




Are you on the Ketogenic diet?
The gluten free diet?
Going Vegan?
Vegetarian not Vegan. (Learn the difference or you will be embarrassed.)
Low Carb?
Mediterranean?
Low fat?
High Protein?
Atkins?
Raw Food?
South Beach?
Paleo?
Grapefruit diet?
Cabbage Soup?
Sirtfood?
Carnivore diet?
Eggs and wine diet?
Apple Cider Vinegar diet?
Cake cleanse?
Smoothie detox?
No.
No, and no.
Eating is harder to figure out then gender identity. But my new trans-
ition lenses help me see things clearer.
With over one hundred newly recognized genders this year, there will be people celebrating.
Hooray! They will probably have cake!
 
I made this delicious walnut cake last week.
Walnuts are very good for you. 😋
 Maybe I'll post a recipe soon.
Anyway, dieting is something I’m supposed to be doing. (Seriously, I replaced white bread with croissants.)😍
The more I read about the dangerous, long term consequences of dieting, the more I rebel.  
"Let me eat cake," is up there with Russian Roulette and cliff diving in Mazatlan. These are perilous times folks. I'm saying folks to be inclusive to everyone.

Husband can cut out one soda and lose twenty pounds! Just like that! Poof! He misses one meal and looks like a haggard, homeless man. 
Men. Yeah, it’s a gender thing and I’m not too keen on the way they can brag about having great metabolisms.  
Meanwhile, I’m swimming my heart out and walking our lazy pooches all over the place. Apparently, I'd have to walk to the moon and back to burn all my calories.

They should have the Exhausted but I Can't Give Up Cake Diet. It could consist of three hundred calories of anything delicious three times a day. Maybe three generous slices of chocolate cake and a few carrot sticks to equal things out? Hmm.
I didn't think so. 

10 comments:

  1. Funny! Yeah, I can lose weight much faster than my wife.

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  2. Everything in moderation, I say. Makes more sense than herbal tea cleanses and the Russian borscht diet.

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    Replies
    1. I think moderation works if you have fantastic will power and a strong moral compass. Lol

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  3. Cake diet is a winner !

    cheers, parsnip and badger

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  4. I am pro walnut cake with a raw carrot on the side diet. All food groups are represented. It's as all inclusive as making up a new gender. LOL

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  5. I do not diet! I cut out white bread, pancakes, and most pastas years ago as they left me bloated. Yes, men lose weight far faster than women. Just ignore Steve when it comes to eating (if you can). Good luck with the diet.

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